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Joke of the Day

"In case you haven't checked Facebook, It's hot today, the fireworks were beautiful, and 32 friends invited you to play candy crush!"

"Not to brag but I'm never late for work without a good reason. For example this week my boss is on vacation..."

"Did you see the fantastic four? Human torch played by uncle ruckus."

"What do you call a pig who is a rapper Piggy Smalls"

"What's the objective of Jewish football? To get the quarterback."

"Satan was all alone with Eve, NAKED, at the forbidden tree and all he did was to convince her to eat a fruit? GAY."

"Two pretzels are walking down the street. One was assaulted."

"The ONLY reason I haven't unfriended you yet is because you have huge boobs and I have a feeling that I would miss seeing them."

"""Please don't do this."" - my voice mail greeting"

"Tree men walk into a bar They order root beer and leaf before paying."