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Joke of the Day

"(Interview) Says here on your resume that you're unpredictable. (I take a squirrel out of my pants dressed as Batman) ""That's a rumor""."

"I'm the weakest in my Asian family They call me weak-Ling"

"If you say the words 'beer can' in a British accent, it sounds like you're saying 'bacon' in a Jamaican accent."

"The biggest threat to mankind is aliens somehow receiving transmissions of Xbox Live conversations and deciding to just blow up the planet."

"A Black Couple Are Having Sex Black guy: Who's yo daddy? Black girl: I dunno lol Black guy: Same lol"

"What kind of tea do you pay an arm and a leg for? Amputee"

"Why did Theon Greyjoy become Reek as Ramsay Bolton's hostage? He was suffering from Starkhome syndrome"

"What is the best way to get called a ,""genius?"" ...by losing a billion dollars in business."

"The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone has stolen every lamp in his house."

"The most Canadian sentence ever. Sorry aboot spilling too much maple syrup into your Tim Hortons coffee, eh?"