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Joke of the Day

"Why did the fruits take out a $30,000 loan for their wedding? Because they cantaloupe."

"The winner of Powerball should really invest in a diverse portfolio There's also Mega Millions, Tri-State, and SuperLotto."

"[NSFW] If sex with three people is a threesome And sex with two people is a twosome... Then I get why some people call me handsome."

"What's got 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"If you say the words 'beer can' in a British accent, it sounds like you're saying 'bacon' in a Jamaican accent."

"I would never have a threesome. If I wanted to disappoint two people at once I'd have dinner with my parents."

"My brother's looking for a girlfriend. Trouble is he can't find a girl who loves him as much as he loves himself."

"Did you hear about the dumb father who returned from lunch and saw a sign on his door ""Back in 30 minutes"" so he sat down to wait for himself?"

"For the longest time I hated tumors.... but they are beginning to grow on me."

"What do you call a snake that's exactly 3.14 meters long? A thon"