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Joke of the Day

"*Robocop smashes tail light* Uh oh, that's a citation *He drops a bag of weed* Damn that's 20 years *Robohippie starts to sweat*"

"So i was sitting on the toilet today... Nah it's a shit joke, nevermind"

"What do you get if you cross a glow-worm with a python? A twenty-foot-long strip-light that can squeeze you to death."

"A recent study found that an estimated 25% of Republicans are on medication for mental illness. Why in the hell are we letting the other 75% go untreated???"

"I just realized that no matter what it says on my tombstone I'm going to have to read it upside down."

"The Toyota Prius will help reduce your gas bill and your sex life."

"What do liberals and homeless people have in common? They are always asking for change."

"Me: *delivers fantastic presentation* Fish Boss: great work! Me: thanks for letting MINNOW what you think! Fish Boss: you're fired."

"Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it's too far to walk"

"How does a racist joke start? A small loan of a million dollars."