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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a monk who walks everywhere in bare feet, has poor bone density and really bad breath? A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis."

"The letter E is used frequently and infrequently."

"I ate a bad vegetarian kebab for lunch. Now I falafel."

"I just bought some 300 noise cancelling headphones for my wife. But i can still hear her."

"You hear about the gay guy who has a job in construction? He works in a manhole."

"My girlfriend asked me to stop playing mind games. I looked confused and asked, ""Who are you again?"""

"France and Italy declare war... France surrenders and Italy switches sides. Both countries lose."

"It's that time of year I'm just going to say it now so I can say I said it first I'll see you guys next year Now shut the fuck up with that joke"

"""In case of emergency break glass"" Who do you think I am? Some sort of karate expert? I can't even open a Cheetos bag."

"As an American of Chinese decent, I offered my services to help Trump to build his wall. He replied that he didn't think it would be a good idea for me to build the barrier in my own internment camp."