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Joke of the Day

"I am so proud to be part of a society that needs television commercials to remind us not to lock our kids in hot cars."

"Why didn't the Duke of Windsor let his French servant help him tie his tie? He never does it with a four-in (foreign)-hand."

"So a termite walks into a bar... ...and asks, ""Hey, is the bar tender here?"""

"Time = Money because you SPEND it!"

"What did the buddhist monk say when he was asked if he was leaving? Na 'ma stay. (namaste) Grandfather joke at Easter dinner last sunday. Sorry."

"What should a rabbit use to keep his fur neat? A harebrush."

"If you were to look at my search history you might think I was a history buff... ... but in reality I just enjoy masturbating to pictures of Holocaust victims."

"Who doesn't like to sit in front of the fire? A Snowman."

"I hope my search for my lost heroin... isn't in vein."

"How do you blow a movie quote? You just put your lips together and whistle"