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Joke of the Day

"I don't blame sharks. If someone walked into my house and started splashing around in my bath, I'd bite their leg off too."

"""How dare you judge her size..."" ""The woman has had three children!"" ""For lunch?"""

"When in doubt, ask yourself WWBD: What Would Beyonce Do? Would she apply for a job? Nope. She'd just show up one day like ""I work here now."""

"Anyone remember the joke about the dwarf? Can't think right now, should be easy to remember, it was only a short one."

"Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? ( say it out loud )"

"What did Abraham Lincoln say after recovering from a 3-day drinking binge? *""I set* ***who*** *free?""*"

"How to find out who loves you more - your dog or your wife? Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes."

"Do you know what 8/10 redditors say they hate the most? The answer might surprise you... ..clickbait."

"What's the difference between sandpaper and a baby? The sandpaper doesn't scream when I rub it's face on wood."

"The ostrich may have the right idea but I hate sand in my hair."