65782

Joke of the Day

"we lost our power ""why?"" a transformer blew up by our house *eyes widen* ""that's awes-"" it's not as cool as it sounds"

"Osama bin Laden threatened Russia: If you get caught up in this war... I'll hide from you too!"

"Q: How many blonde jokes are there? A: One - the rest are all true."

"When does CPR become Necrophlia? When tongue is involved."

"Did you guys hear about the gay astronaut? He landed on Uranus"

"What is the worst place to have the ""you break it, you buy it"" rule? The pet store"

"What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman? Mick Jagger says, ""Hey you, get offa' my cloud."" A Scotsman says, ""Hey McCloud, get offa' my ewe."""

"Pro tip: If you forget their name after a one night stand, just take them to Starbucks in the morning."

"I'm basically shuffling papers and watching the clock until the next Batman movie."

"A gymnast walks into a bar. He gets a two-point deduction and ruins his chances of a medal."