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Joke of the Day

"I have found a cure for people suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder... ... just send them to concentration camps."

"[puts baby in highchair] Ohhh HIGH chair, I get it. That explains why all you do is eat, sleep & drool you stupid little stoner."

"We have enough breakfast items for the toaster now, food scientists. Move on to the car heater vent."

"My favorite part of grocery shopping is rushing home to look at the shopping list on my counter to see what I forgot to buy."

"My dad called to ask if sending an email to the USA costs more. I told him a LOT more, better not risk it"

"""Ok, hear me out. What if we gave people enough for three fries?"" -guy who invented ketchup packets"

"Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play? A: They're trying to get away from the noise."

"I exaggerate too much. My whole life is a hyperbole."

"Ramadan Putting the slim in Muslim."

"Coming to work drunk, it's like a computer games Your main task is get pass the boss."