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Joke of the Day

"Why did the carpenter's wife leave him? He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her."

"A Polish guy goes to the eye doctor The doctor holds up a chart: K Z S Y X W K P G and asks the man if he can read it. ""Read it?"" he says, ""I *know* the guy!"""

"Whenever you say ""I'll shoot you an email,"" it makes me wish I could shoot you in email."

"What comes in hard, comes out soft, and what do you blow hard? chewing gum, you sicko..."

"Whats the difference between a woman and a floppy drive? A Floppy Drive can only take 3.5"" Inches."

"Australian politics"

"What do you call an American Drawing? A Yankee Doodle."

"I'm all set for Friday night: got my mac 'n cheese dinner, 40 oz., 'Steel Magnolias' DVD, Twitter friends and tears."

"Groin cream... Not suitable for those with a nut allergy."

"What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce patch? Seizure Salad"