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Joke of the Day
"My corn tortillas want me to like them on Facebook. Fuck the future."
Next Joke
"Just got a cat with a limp Called it Oedipus the needipus."
"There's a movie coming out about a big rig truck. Have you seen the trailer?"
"How do you know Adam and Eve weren't Chinese? They would have eaten the snake"
"Hate it when i accidentally drink a small amount of a carbonated beverage and my body is unable to release the gas and i pop like a seagull."
"[highschool reunion] CLASSMATE: I'm a top chef. You? ME: I'm an avoca C: a what M: an avoca C: what's an avoca do M: a top chef would know"
"What do you get when you breed a rabbit with an elephant? A dead rabbit with a beat-up asshole."
"Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny."
"What is green and sits crying in the corner? The incredible Sulk."
"I'm so ugly... I can't even turn on a lamp"