59616

Joke of the Day

"What sound does an octopus make? A squid word."

"Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming. ^^^^^Sorry"

"Why can't Two-Face kill Batman? Because he's two Dents."

"Michael Jackson's latest autopsy report states that he didn't actually die at home. He died in the hospital - he was found in the children's ward having a stroke."

"Darn it A man was walking around his backyard in his stocking feet and stubbed his toe on a rock. His sock exclaimed ""I'll be darned!"""

"My wife keeps telling me I shouldn't pee in the bath Or if I really have to, I should at least wait till she gets out."

"Did you hear about the skeleton that couldn't go to the party? He had no body to go with."

"""I'm very sorry, but you will die soon"", said the doctor ""How soon?"", the frail man asked, his body trembling at every word. ""In ten."" ""Ten what? Ten years? Ten-"" ""Nine."" ""Eight."""

"Eventually Adobe is going to release a software application that does nothing but update itself."

"Okay you guys, I'm gonna distract Twitter with an internal server error. When I do, make a run for it and get your life back."