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Joke of the Day

"Okay you guys, I'm gonna distract Twitter with an internal server error. When I do, make a run for it and get your life back."

"What do you a call tree sex? A treesome..."

"I love England th... I love England the flags a big plus"

"If a tree falls in the woods It won't make a sound because it has been copyright claimed by Warner Music Group."

"When British people get something stuck in their teeth, it's usually just another tooth."

"-Knock knock -Who's there? -Go fuck yourself!"

"""I'm a huge fan."" - Peacocks"

"Quit college. Become an oven. Get up to like 500 degrees."

"Japanese gardener gets tired of being bossed around by homeowner You think he say ""Leaf me alone"", but he say ""Fuck you, homeowner, fuck you..."""

"Lil' Wayne looks pretty good for a scarecrow that is being eaten from the inside out by bats."