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Joke of the Day

"What gets very small when exposed to cold? **YOUR PE**..anut butter ice cream crave"

"""You know, I'm doomed to get eternal damnation to the Hell"" said Edward Cullen. -- Because you are a vampire, creature of Night and Darkness? -- No, because I'm an atheist."

"Why were Kay's pets scared of Kay? because... K8 K9"

"After sex, a lot of people like to smoke a cigarette. As a gay man, me and my boyfriend smoke weed after sex. After all, in the bible it says ""if a man lies with another man, he should be stoned."""

"The flower had an unexpected pregnancy... So it went to Plant Parenthood."

"Why did the hippie put his money in the refrigerator? He liked cold cash."

"The bartender asks him what he'd like to drink. A time traveler walks into a bar."

"I heard the latest statistic that 1 in 3 people cheat on their significant others that means either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me. Hmm...."

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Off duty cop: No *cop gets so close their mustaches interlock like velcro* You're driving great, pal"

"If a tramp and a bunch of rich people are dressed the same, how does the tramp stand out? He begs to differ."