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Joke of the Day

"Did you see that crazy news story on the internet? Of course. You reddit"

"Relationships are a lot like algebra... Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?"

"I overheard two of my friends talking about me the other day... I said ""you disgust me"" ""Yes, we did"" they replied."

"The 1st rule of idiom club is loose lips sink ships. The 2nd rule is don't let the cat out of the bag. Last but not least, the 3rd rule."

"What do you call an eskimo peeping tom? Tom Tookalook. I'm sorry guys..."

"Batman (1989): An orphan fights a clown"

"Sounds like its time to get that Enterprise built!"

"Will only make sense to geezers... Q: What do Hot Lips Hoolihan and Richard Pryor have in common? A: They both have had major burns on their face."

"What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken."

"""Holy shit, that guy eats a lot of pizza"" -people that walk by my house on recycling day."