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Joke of the Day

"Somebody told me that rum and coke wasn't the answer to my problems. I told them that it might not be the answer, but it was certainly a solution."

"What's one thing you hated as a kid but love as an adult? Molestation."

"Two Muffins Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin says to the second, ""Is it getting hot in here?"" The second muffin says ""AAAAHHHH!!!! A talking muffin!!!"""

"I've been teaching myself French so that I can seduce my wife Boner Petite, baby!"

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lima bean? I've never paid to have a lima bean on my chest."

"When I go to a restaurant, I stare at the menu for 10 minutes, and then order the exact same thing I did the last 20 times I've been there."

"What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer? You take me for grunted."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Carlene ! Carlene who ? Carlene against that wall ?"

"What do you say when somebody else has ruined your joke? RIP post"

"How many seconds are there in one year? 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd."