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Joke of the Day

"For my birthday my friends got me a sweater. I would have preferred a screamer or moaner, but a sweater was fine."

"What's the difference between your wife and your job? Job still sucks after 5 years."

"What do you get when you cross a sheep and a porcupine? Nobody knows, but whatever it is, it knits its own sweaters."

"What's the difference between an old bus stop and a lobster with large breasts? One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean Credit; Dad"

"I just farted in an elevator. Which was wrong on so many levels."

"Cherry tree How do you hide a elephant in a cherry tree? Paint it's balls red. Howed Tarzan die? Picking cherries."

"What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? One goes... *WHACK*...""Dang it!"" And the other goes... ""Dang it!""...*WHACK*"

"Why did the developers have to delay their pirate game? They needed to give their characters an eye-patch."

"What's a golfer's favourite games console? A PS FOUR!"

"I almost got caught stealing a board game today... but it was a Risk I was willing to take."