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Joke of the Day

"I just farted in an elevator. Which was wrong on so many levels."

"What do you call a guy with eight dicks? A coctopus"

"I'm going to go to the gym and then to eat a Doritos Loco Taco, because I like to keep my body guessing whether or not I hate it."

"Apparently someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor Bastard."

"How did the sperm cross the road? I put the wrong socks on today. ^(credit to /u/jackster_)"

"Why does Santa come only once a year? (Its not the chimney one) Because it's all his sack can handle"

"I used to be a taxi driver. Do you know why I gave it up? I didn't like people talking behind my back!"

"The Greek Economy Forever A Loan!"

"What's the difference between a drunk and a stoner? A drunk drives right through a stop sign, a stoner waits for it to turn green."

"Ruth and Johnny, side by side, went out for an auto ride. They hit a bump, Ruth hit a tree, Johnny kept going Ruthlessly."