56544

Joke of the Day

"before mcdonald's i bet ""don't buy cheeseburgers from a clown"" was a pretty hard and fast rule"

"What's the problem with Java jokes? They have no *class*."

"A jogger just yelled at me for accidentally blowing pot smoke in his face. So I yelled at him for making me feel fat."

"[Me being beaten to death w/ can of frozen veggies] ""Oh peas no!"" [WHAP] ""Why u bean like this?"" [SMACK] ""Don't u carrot all?"" [CRACK]"

"How to you call midget intercourse ? Microtransaction"

"What do you say to a girlfriend who calls you a lazy couch potato? Well let me tell you..."

"What is the biggest joke? Reddit."

"5: let's play the quiet game. Me: Okay 5: ready..? Start. Me: 5: Me: 5: whoever talks first is the loser."

"What do you call a hispanic man who spilled his nachos? A messycan"

"It's so frustrating when your hitman doesn't answer the phone after you've made amends with someone"