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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the astronaut book a room on the moon? Because it was full."

"Most of us are 2 feet away from being a double amputee..."

"Why did the Hobbit put his phone on silent? Because he was bored of the rings!"

"I exercise religiously. Which means I go running dressed as the Pope."

"What do you get a man who has everything? storage"

"what did mick jagger say when he caught hugh hefner and dennis weaver in the bedroom together? hey, hugh, get off of mccloud."

"That new film, The Finest Hours, looks really good the plot looks very submerging"

"If I was ever on Jeopardy I would call Trebek the wrong name like I'd never heard of him. ""I'll take Beauty Pageants for 400, Jason."""

"What breed will Donald Trumps dog be if he wins the election? A Border Collie"

"I once fell in love with an English Teacher.... ...I wrote her a love letter and she corrected it."