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Joke of the Day

"Ever since I installed Adblocker Plus things haven't been going so well.. All of a sudden chicks in my area are no longer interested in me."

"I'm an insomniac, and I fucking hate it... My friends sleep like a log and they love it, but when I try I have nightmares about lumberjacks."

"Two peanuts are walking down the street... one's assaulted."

"What is the collective noun for three dyslexics? A riot."

"What did one tectonic plate say to the other after the earthquake? That was your fault!!!"

"A magnet walked into a bar. It stuck."

"My mum showed my girlfriend my baby photos. ""You haven't changed at all,"" said my girlfriend. ""Alright mum,"" I said, ""that's enough of the naked ones."""

"A joke my three year old brother told me Why do cows poop carrots? BECAUSE THEY'RE CARROT COWS!!!"

"What do you call two roosters having a fight? A Cock-a-Doodle-Duel!"

"Guys, don't let this headphones thing mislead you, women that aren't wearing them probably don't want to talk to you either"