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Joke of the Day

"Ways to tell a woman's mad at you: 1. She's silent. 2. She's yelling. 3. She acts the same. 4. She acts different. 5. She murdered you."

Next Joke
 
"The thing I love most about dad jokes... ...is how they keep pushing the boundaries of humour father and father."
"If I got 1 for everytime a girl called me unattractive I'd be attractive"
"Why did the spy cross a road? Because he never was on your side."
"The roads must have been full of Communists... I kept hitting reds on the way home."
"How long does it take to reach the ground from 110 stories up? The rest of your life."
"What happened when the sausage came in first? An announcer said, ""Ladies and gentlemen, we have a wiener!"""
"What do you call a bird that drunkenly conveys a compelling perspective on racial hatred? Tequila Mockingbird."
"You know what happened when your mom went swimming? The Titanic sank"
"Why won't anyone eat the dogs birthday cake? Because he always slobbers out the candles!"