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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people."

"What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise? Lmayo."

"My girlfriend wanted me to include her more.. My girlfriend cuddled up to me and said ""I wish you would play with me like to do those video games"". So, I Dragon-punched her in the face."

"Why do Nuns always wear Black & White? No particular reason, it's just a habit they have."

"Guys love it when you rest your head on their shoulder at the movie theatre. Their girlfriends however... not so much."

"What does Snoop Lion do when he forgets to wear oven mitts? Drops it like it's hot."

"My sexual orientation is definitely Landscape. I dabbled with Portrait but my legs got tired."

"TIL the British used U-boats Whoops, wrong sub"

"In the beginning there was nothing......then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said ""Get a job"". That is the story of the universe."

"When I see a girl, I first look at her hair. Then at her eyes, lips, neck... Damn dial-up!"