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Joke of the Day

"I always envisioned Hermione as a burly, middle-aged Italian fellow, so imagine my surprise when the films revealed her to be a little girl."

"Don't believe anything a weatherman says until he takes off the jacket and rolls up the sleeves."

"Forgot that I made a cup of coffee... now mass immigration has caused it to go cold."

"What two words have thousands of letters in them? Post office."

"How do you know you've satisfied a redhead? She unlocks the handcuffs. Edit: for everyone that isn't getting it, it means kinky sex"

"Pick up line#375: hey are you a school? Because i want to shoot kids inside you."

"If he says ""you're 1 in a million"" it means he either has no knowledge of the world population or he thinks there are 7000 people like you"

"2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Badum tsss."

"Just got off the phone with my mom. She had a good chat. Unrelated, there are 1273 Cheerios left in this box."

"I tried to make this post all about why Finland DOES actually exist... ...but I couldn't Finnish."