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Joke of the Day

"I love it when waiters tell me to tell them when to stop grating cheese on my meal. It's cheese, dude. We'll be here a while."

"What does an 80 yr old lady have between her tits that an 18 yr old woman doesn't have? A bellybutton"

"What's the worst thing to say to a friend you see on a plane? Hi Jack!"

"I like my drinks like I like my women.... Stiff and cold."

"Why Don't Lobsters Share? Because they're shellfish."

"This bar smells so bad and I can't tell who's homeless and who's a hipster."

"Stop supporting Russian companies! I hear they all use Slav labor!"

"Why do most people from Russia wear track suits? Because they are Russin'"

"Came home to find my girlfriend packing her stuff... I asked her what she was doing, she says ""I'm leaving you, you sick peadophile!"" ""Peadophile! That's a big word for an 8 year old!"""

"What did Jimmy Carter say to Ronald Reagan? Let me Eat your Turds !! Lol !!"