53349

Joke of the Day

"Why is pulling out 100% effective for superman? They never survive the 1000ft fall to earth. (Thanks Drawn Together)"

"Why did the astronomer hit himself on the head in the afternoon? He wanted to see stars during the day."

"As you get older dating becomes a lot like Musical Chairs. The music stops, everyone sits down and you're left with the last idiot standing."

"It costs over $235,000 for parents to raise a child today. And that's just for the alcohol."

"Here's a quick joke for all you telepathic people out there."

"Still good at casually flexing my bicep the second before a girl touches it."

"What tastes good but doesn't smell good? A tongue. Hehe"

"What's the difference between acne and a priest? Acne waits for a boy to be 14 before it comes on his face"

"If you're wearing sunglasses & it's not at all sunny out, you can't get offended when I grab your arm to guide you safely across the street."

"Black Friday has taken all of my money : Robinson Crusoe"