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Joke of the Day

"Two skeletons open up a pasta resteraunt to serve the afterlife. What's the resteraunt called? The Bone Zone."

"What do you call a pun in a marathon? A running joke"

"TEXTATIONSHIP: a person that texts you all the time but never makes an effort to see you."

"I tried on a Trojan Magnum...its really hard to breathe in those things."

"Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He tried to drink tea before it was cool."

"Just robbed a bakery I kneaded the dough."

"No, my kid didn't do the drawings I have up around my desk. I did them. It's my desk."

"How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb??"

"When a knight in armour was killed in battle what sign did they put on his grave ? Rust in peace !"

"""What sins have you committed?"" Well... [20 minutes later] ... finally fit my whole fist up there. I shit you not. Father? *vomiting sound*"