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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a vehicle with no fuel in Africa? Outtagascar"

"Q: Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? A: They steal all the green cards."

"What did George Takei say to the attractive Frenchman on waterskis? Eau myyyyyyyy...."

"Me: *mouths I love you* Him: M: *blows kiss* H: M: *adjusts my pajama top* H: *empties the can & hops onto the side of the garbage truck*"

"I don't see how flight MH370 sunk. When it hit the water it would have been plane sailing."

"At willcall for a concert, I start a conversation with the lady in front of me. It was the first time I had used a pick up line to talk to a woman."

"I noticed you just hit the snooze alarm. MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOWWWWW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW"

"What do Batman's parents shout when dinners ready? NOTHING, BECAUSE THEY'RE DEAD."

"Why should you never trust a cheap circumcision? It's a total ripoff."

"Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? They fall through his hands."