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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to be so rich I forgot what country I left my private jet at after a crazy weekend"

"I bet Usher shows everyone to their seats at his concerts."

"What have working for the KGB and oral sex got in common? One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit."

"Another ""Priceless"" joke. Vodka 19.99. Motel room 64.99. Condoms 9.99. Finding out she swallows and likes it in the ass? Priceless! Fuck Mastercard, it pays to Discover"

"I saw a beautiful pumpkin today... It was gourdeous."

"Why are Cal Tech and MIT constantly Fighting? Because MIT blames Cal Tech for stealing their Feynman, and there will never be another man as Fine."

"Sometimes I go days without even thinking about the Alamo."

"When life hands you alligators, make gator aid."

"What does a guy who's never had sex and feminists have in common they both get annoyed when you start talking about all the girls you've sleep with"

"A long joke jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke"