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Joke of the Day
"New science shows that diarrhea is hereditary. It runs in your jeans."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between a Japanese person and a cannibal? One eats Ramen, the other eats Raw Men"
"What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of lettuce? Chicken sees a salad"
"What do you call someone who spends the whole time on their phone whenever you hang out? A phoney friend!"
"Alcohol not only expands the blood vessels but also communications."
"It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a cockroach move out. ""Good luck,"" he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases."
"Me: Wow, you're glowing. Her: Aaaaww, thank you! Me: No, like radioactive... Her: . . . Me: Tone down the filters?"
"What do you call a pirate who solves mysteries? A pirate aye!"
"[Bad joke] The other day my sister asked me what the difference between cellular division and a sock is To which I replied 'Nothing, they both involve mitosis'"
"[2 years after going missing at zoo] wife: [points at TV] ""omg thats him"" me: [on the news inside kangaroos pouch] ""why is noone helping me"""