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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if your wife is dead? [NSFW] The sex is the same but the dishes pile up. Didn't make this up, credit goes to the morning show I was listening to this morning."

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"Jesus may have turned water into wine But I turned a whole student loan check into vodka"
"I was out with my bf and a waiter called me a 'cradle robber' cuz he's 18 and I'm 43. Totally ruined our 10th anniversary."
"The Worst Joke Ever What kind of jokes do farmers tell? CORNY JOKES!!!"
"Why did the cows keep returning to the field of marijuana? It was the pot calling the cattle back."
"If a rich man dies from a drug overdose, the headline should read ""Pills bury dough boy"" Credit to my friend Chris"
"How were the Jews captured during World War 2? They could not resist a ho-low-cost."
"What do you call a gay Asian guy? Rice-a-Roni"
"What are the three worst words to hear while you are having sex? Honey, I'm home!"
"As a non-US-redditor I don't understand why right-wing gun nuts don't get along better with left-wing SJWs... ...they both seem to love triggers so much."