48705

Joke of the Day

"I recently bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping ever since."

"The doctors tested a man to see if he was gay. He passed with flying colors."

"There's no I... in collaboration. Or denial."

"What did the doctor say to the Mesothelioma patient? There's not much I can do, but I'll do asbestos I can!"

"My wife used to have sex with fruit when she was stressed. When I found out, she went fucking bananas."

"Me: Hello darkness, my old friend. Darkness: New phone, who dis?"

"Taken from a UNIX program called fortune. Ralph: Lisa, you have no tits and a awful tight pussy. Lisa: Ralph... get off my back!!"

"If you pronounce the word vase like ""voz"" I'm gonna want to punch you in the foz"

"I am woman, hear me say the opposite of what I mean in that tone that means you'd better do what I meant and not what I said."

"What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out."