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Joke of the Day

"What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? Synonym Toast Crunch If you said Synonym Life, please leave."

"So Jesus walks into a hotel he throws a bunch of nails on the counter and asks:"" hey, can you put me up for the night?"" (sorry, if repeat)"

"Why did Miss Piggy call in sick to work? Because she had a frog in her throat."

"Did you hear about the house the two lesbians made? It was all tongue and groove."

"What did the doctor say to the midget waiting in the lobby? You're just going to have to be a little patient."

"Q: How do you sell chicken to a deaf man? A: HEY, YOU WANNA BUY SOME CHICKEN??!!!!!!!"

"If you call the suicide hotline in Iraq they ask if you know how to drive a truck."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his girlfriend on the other side, but then he got taken by McDonalds and crushed for chicken nuggets."

"Having erectile dysfunction must be hard Oh wait... No, never mind."

"Date: Lets break the ice. Polar bear: break th-[shatters Coke bottle] BREAK THE ICE? What are you saying?! D: I mea- PB: THATS MY HOME LINDA"