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Joke of the Day

"Judging by the number of hats on the hanger... ...and the amount of shoes underneath, I am married to a three-headed spider."

"How many dead hookers does it take to change a lightbulb? Well it ain't three cause my basement is still dark."

"What did the Moderate Moslem say before hitting a guy for criticizing his religion? It's alright, reddit'll say this had nothing to do Islam."

"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning..."

"Do you file your nails? I throw mine away. -Dean Martin"

"You staring at your phone= jerk. Me staring at my phone= cool guy with lots of shit happening in his life."

"What did the sadist say to the masochist? No Probably has been put on here before but it made me chuckle."

"2 pacs of eminems for 50 cents? Man that's Ludacris"

"Watch 'Titanic' backwards and it's the feel-good story of a ship that rescues a bunch of drowning swimmers and takes them on a dream cruise."

"So many Jesus accounts...and not one is verified"