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Joke of the Day

"[1st day at work] BOSS: Erm..we..have No Smoking rules here ME: That's great Alan [blows out smoke] most places have loads of smoking rules"

"Both her name and her living situation suggests that the dwarves MAY have been referring to Snow White when they sang, 'high ho.'"

"What kind of wine does ISIS drink? White Infidel."

"Did you hear about the ghost who got a vasectomy? He had phantom loads."

"I can be a real tiger in bed. No, wait, wait... What's that animal that plays dead?"

"Why do some people call it a ""tuna-fish"" sandwich? It's not like anyone calls it a ""chicken-bird"" sandwich."

"There are few things more awkward on a blind date than looking up from your phone to realise she's left. She obviously wasn't blind at all."

"Why don't men install urinals in their houses? Their wives just wouldn't stand for it :)"

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Choked"

"I was driving down a street with a magician He turned into a driveway"