46848

Joke of the Day

"""You haven't been listening to a word I've said, have you?"" It always felt like a strange way for my girlfriend to start a conversation..."

"What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? ""Bison"""

"Here's a good joke! /r/TwoXChromosomes"

"What do you call a 12 year old protein? A pretein"

"Me: excuse me waitress, I ordered this filet medium-rare and it's clearly a peanut butter and jelly Wife: did you just call me ""waitress""?"

"Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way."

"Little boy blue. He needed the money. credit: Andrew Dice Clay"

"Why did email come easy to the lumberjack? He was already very familiar with loggin' :D"

"States are like butts No one likes the flat ones."

"""I just want a nice guy who treats me right."" said every girl who dumped that dude like ten times."