46481
Joke of the Day
"What do you call it when an ex pees on you? EX-STREAM!"
Next Joke
"Bear: *lowers sunglasses. Is it *beary* serious? Cops:...Ok that's funny but but you mauled a child so yes. You have to go back to the zoo."
"""Give it to me!"" she said, ""I'm so fcuking wet, give it to me right now!"" And I replied, ""Fcuk you, it's my umbrella!"
"Your swag is gonna look amazing on that Burger King application."
"Have you tried rocky mountain oysters? They're offal."
"My 7yo gave up a simple joke thats good enough 2 laugh at. Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Cause it was stuck on the chicken's foot!"
"How Does Sean Connery Wash His Dishes? Like a Bosch!"
"I sometimes lie awake and wonder how much useful information I've left out of my brain to make room for these Hanson songs."
"What is the definition of trust? Two cannibals giving each other a blowjob."
"*notices wife has 5 asparagus on her plate while I only have 4* everything ok? ""fine"" [hour later during car ride home] you're speeding"