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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the witch who was so ugly that when a tear rolls down her cheek it takes one look at her face and rolls straight up again?"

"Will was killed during his first battle with the US army His comrades got confused when their commander yelled: ""Fire at Will!"""

"Arnold Schwarzenegger glancing up excitedly and then looking away disappointedly multiple times while watching the intro to ""Hey Arnold"""

"*returns tent to Target* CASHIER: What was the problem? ME: The packing implied that there would be a family that loves me inside the tent"

"Why did the teacher have her hair in a bun? Because she had her nose in a hamburger."

"My dancing style can best be described as ""Guy On Maury Who Just Found Out He Isn't The Father."""

"Funny prank: stay over at a friend's house and die on their couch."

"Someone's been sleeping in my bed, said Papa Bear. Someone's been sleeping in MY bed, said Mama. Why don't u share a bed?! cried Baby Bear."

"Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds super fun if you don't know what either of those things are."

"How many mexicans does it take to build a house in.... Shit he's done"