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Joke of the Day
"How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for french fries."
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"Someone rang my doorbell twice this morning, so I guess I'm having lunch behind the couch."
"OC: What does a limo driver and a hairy stripper have in common? They both get paid to chauffeur. (show fur)"
"What do you call a terrorist holding an AK47 to your head? Sir."
"If my wife were a car, she'd be a Ferrari. I paid through the nose for it but only take it out for a spin maybe once a month. ... Also, I wish I had a Ferrari."
"""If two wrongs don't make a right, what do two rights make?"" An Airplane"
"DOG COP: sir, you ran a gray light DOG DRIVER: it was gray! COP: no, it was gray! DRIVER: gray! COP: *starts barking* DRIVER: *barking*"
"Police found the neighbourhood paedophile shot in the head 27 times. Authorities ruled it the worst case of suicide in a decade."
"My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel. I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome."
"I like my coffee like I like my women Ground up and in the fridge."