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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a racist person and a racist skeleton? They both are insulting, but the skeleton doesn't have any body to share racist jokes with!"

"What did the doctor say to the patient who refused to stop masturbating? Don't make it hard for yourself."

"Had some mushrooms this morning. Breakfast of Champignons."

"Where do literal dogs live? On the roof."

"What's the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law, the other is a sick bird. Thanks folks, tip your waitresses I'll be here all day!"

"How do we know that hamburgers love classic music? They're often found at the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!"

"I keep an identical glass of vodka next to the glass of water on my bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette"

"(JOKE).""KERMIT THE FROG"" vanndukeandsammy sammy:what is kermit the frog favorite food?....vann duke: I don't know,tell me what is kermit the frog favorite food?....sammy:french flies!"

"I pulled a muscle turning over in bed. Cause that's how I roll."