4419
Joke of the Day
"what do you get when you mix 9th grade literature with alcohol? Tequila mockingbird."
Next Joke
"Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? because they're ugly, and they smell bad [and hate jokes](http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/d2gmw/why_do_girls_wear_makeup_and_perfume/)"
"What do you call Batman when he skips church? Christian Bale"
"Why does Jesus like Japanese food? Because he loves miso"
"What's the quickest way to clean semen off a poodle? Seriously. I need to know because my mother-in-law is due back home in about 20 minutes."
"What's orange and sounds like a carrot!!!???? A snowman blowing his nose!!!!!!!!"
"I haven't washed my dogs in months I guess I like my bitches dirty"
"friend: Are you eating a whole frozen pizza by yourself? me: It was on sale for $4 friend: I wasnt asking because I thought it was expensive"
"My boss texted me... My boss texted me: ""Send me one of your funny jokes"" I replied: ""I will send you one l8r, I'm working right now"" He replied: ""LMAO, send me another one!"""
"Just pressed a picture of my new Corvette against the glass of the shark tank at the aquarium & said ""You guys ain't shit."""