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Joke of the Day

"What is the similarity between women and square roots? If they are under 16 you should just do them in your head."

"Me: I must warn you, I'm like an animal in bed. Her: That's fine by me! *burrows under the covers and falls asleep at the foot of the bed*"

"""IT WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS!!!"" I yell at the guy next to me at the red light while tweezing stray hairs from my chin."

"Let's hold off calling dolphins the smartest animal until they stop getting caught in nets."

"Comas can really change the meaning of a sentence. For example: ""Ben is in a hurry"" ""Ben is in a coma"""

"What do you call hiring German engineers to work on your overseas project? Krautsourcing"

"Knock, knock Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? I didn't know you knew how to yodel!"

"I've always been corny... When I was born, there were three storks. One to deliver me and two to fend off the crows."

"Two snowmen in a field, one turned to the other and said ""I don't know about you but I can smell carrots!"""

"It Looks Like a Booger But it's SNOT!"