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Joke of the Day

"My dad, a vietnam veteran, told me that there's one thing that always sticks with kids and adults no matter how old they are. Napalm"

"Why are the undead so angry all the time? They have mummy issues."

"Before we hang out, please be advised I will be spending the rest of the summer talking like Bane."

"Ugh this morning this cop was all ""what's with the fake mustache"" & ""you can't throw turtle shells out of your vehicle"" & ""who's Yoshi"""

"What's black and got ten arms? I've got no idea, but it probably can pick cotton like hell."

"My therapist thinks meeting women on twitter for sex is a bad idea. His wife disagrees."

"How many programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it's a hardware problem!"

"I'm no sadist. Some of my best friends are sad."

"If Google ever goes down and stays down, I'm fucked. I know four facts and they're all about elephants and I already forgot three of them."

"A (Non-Racist) Chinese Joke A Chinese man and a Chinese woman get married. They have a baby boy. What color is the sun? &nbsp; Yellow."