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Joke of the Day
"I knew I was going to jail when I yanked at the cop pants and they didn't tear away .."
Next Joke
"If tennis rules were chasing the ball and bringing it to your opponent without letting him have it, my dog would be the best in the world."
"Fuck. I just mentioned that it was my birthday as a pickup line to this hot girl at the bar and her fat friend is now asking about cake."
"It's my life. I'll live it, I'll love it, and I won't care what you think of it."
"Two types of people in the world.... Ones who pee in the shower, and motherf**kin liars"
"If I put on a latex glove and snap it, that's just me flirting"
"I just finished arguing with a friend who thought that Charlize's role as Aeon Flux was much better than her role as Imperator Furiosa. I guess to each Theron."
"R.I.P Satoru Iwata He's pushing Peaches and Daisies now."
"I wonder who I'll be racist against when I'm elderly. I hope it's robots!!"
"*getting murdered* Oh, wow, this is totally clearing my sinuses"