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Joke of the Day

"A man goes into the hospital with 6 plastic horses up his bum... The doctors described his condition as stable."

"Don't ever buy your shoes from your drug dealer. I think he laced mine with something, I've been tripping all day"

"What's got 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"Why are there not more black golfers? Because the bus route doesn't go to the country club."

"I really don't appreciate ghosts coming back from the dead just to tell me I'm doing a bad job. Boooooo"

"My dad told me we were going to Finger Lakes as a family. I asked him, ""Who's Lakes?"""

"Why the long face? ""A horse walks into the bar and the bartender comes over and says, 'Why the long face?'"" - Not my original for sure, but always makes me smirk."

"People with those rims that spin when the car isn't moving, how often do you have to replace the hamsters in those things?"

"A liberal, a moderate, and a conservative walk into a bar... the bartender says 'hey, Mitt.'"

"How do you get to a position of power in a science lab? Work over time"