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Joke of the Day

"Last week I tried talking to a politician about rape laws... She couldn't see where I was coming from."

"Old Man and his Babies"

"How do you know if air fresheners have gotten too smart? If they have become scent-ient."

"A paper cut is a tree's last revenge."

"Dear Dairy There sure are a lot of cows around here."

"What kind of drugs do ducks use? Quack."

"Once I've read about the perils of alcohol, I've decided to stop. Stop reading that is!"

"""Like a glow stick, sometimes we have to break before we shine."""

"My ex wife claims I have ""commitment issues"" like I didn't just wait in line for 30 minutes to get a hot dog at Costco."

"What did they tell the most famous child actress from the 30's when she tried to audition for a role in Harry Potter? Shirley you can't be Sirius."