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Joke of the Day
"Roses are red, Violets are blue... I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast!"
Next Joke
"A cop stops a prostitute... and asks have you ever been picked up by the fuzz before? ""No, but I've been swung around by my titties."""
"What's the difference between an archeologist and an ex girlfriend? The ancient stuff the archeologist digs up is useful."
"The problem with dieting is food."
"How is Disneyland like Viagra? An hour wait for a 30 second ride."
"Longest English word: 'pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosi' Longest Spanish word: 'GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL'"
"My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy...so I came back drunk."
"Did you know Han Solo had an employment agency? Han Jobs"
"the hottest girl u can think of has had diarrhea. kinda puts everything into perspective."
"Why did the spelling bee champ have to go to rehab? He was hooked on phonics."