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Joke of the Day

"Why do ISIS fighters only drink instant coffee? Because they hate the French Press. (This joke used to be more topical)"

"Why do pirates like girls with small tits? Because they always search for sunken chests"

"One problem I had with Catholicism as a child was... all the sexy priests."

"As a child my girlfriend loved train sets Most of my adult friends thinks its weird she still plays with them. I think it's perfectly normal for a 6 year old."

"A fish is swimming down a river when it hits its head on a big wall of stone and says ""dam."""

"Straight Outta Compton Spoiler Eazy-E dies"

"I bet the first guy who threw shit into a fan never knew what an incredible legacy he would leave."

"Today I shot a black man and his wife It was a beautiful wedding"

"[Blackstreet Bakery] Me: [watching the baker kneading dough] ""I love the way you work it"" Baker: ""No diggity?"" Me: ""Baguette up."""

"What do pygmy cannibals eat for breakfast? Weedie Bix!!"