41187

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the witch who turned her friend into an egg? She kept trying to poach her ideas."

"I AM THE BOSS DO NOT FORGOT Boss hangs a poster in Office ""I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET"" He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk. ""Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home."""

"TIFU by ordering the wrong sandwich for my wife. Oops, wrong sub. Edit: Turns out this has been posted before :("

"Why would you never want to go to a gay BBQ? Because the hotdogs taste like shit."

"Not all my tweets are true. For example if ""sex"" and ""lack"" are not in the same tweet then the polygraph will probably run out of ink."

"What crawls up walls and scares the shit outta Jews? Gas pipes."

"How do you know a soprano is at the door? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in."

"When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy."

"Picture the perfect woman. Wrong. You're a guy. You're always wrong."

"How many ears does Spock have? Three: a left ear, a right ear, and the last front ear."