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Joke of the Day

"Your honor, I second that motion Judge: Ma'am, I'm simply reading your husband's request to be cremated"

"I found this addvertisement along the road in Texas Don't Texan drive."

"I would be a better president than Donald Trump This is probably the wrong place to post this because that's not a fucking joke."

"Where do you find a zebra? 25 letters after a, brah."

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virginia mobile"

"One wind turbine says to another ""what music do you like?"" ""well I'm a big metal fan"""

"I used to be a fan of Dell's computers... Now i'm just an air conditioner."

"i order a pizza online and under special requests i write: ""tell me the meaning of life"". when the door bell rings there's only an empty box"

"[walks in to UPS store holding rabid raccoon] Hi my boyfriend said he wants to take a break so I'd like to ship him this please."

"Why isn't there a roomba that cuts grass? Probably some stupid law about sending a blade wielding robot out into the neighborhood."